The American Caliban (substitute) wrote,
The American Caliban
substitute

the end of the rainbow

If dealing with the reality of my life at midpoint feels like this, I would like my delusions back right away.

Never in my wildest nightmares did I think I'd be doing this badly this late in life, or have lost so much that can't be regained, or have such a bleak future to swallow.

I want to deny who I am, but I cannot.

This is Hell.
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