The side effect of reducing my appetite and improving my impulse control has benefits everywhere else, too. Not only am I slowly losing weight, but I don't have as many temptations to give myself a quick dopamine boost with a few drinks, an impulse purchase, or a cigar. Result: I'm no longer increasing in mass or debt, and removing nicotine and any excessive alcohol from the system means less brain chemical troubles from that crap.
I'm also giving EMDR a cautious thumbs up. Big parts of my life are still marked "DO NOT ENTER: ANXIETY AND SELF-HATRED INSIDE" but some of it is less traumatic to deal with on a day-to-day basis. One interesting/annoying discovery is that it's possible to have a really nice, ripe case of posttraumatic stress disorder without having been in combat, raped, or beaten like a gong by your parents. You can get these symptoms just because you're susceptible and some things happened that hit your button, stuff that most people wouldn't see as out-of-the-ordinary trauma. EMDR is intended to slowly work this crap loose, using advanced Metahypnotic Phrenologistication that I do not understand well. So far I have a slight reduction in Pointless Bullshit; I approve.
I had one of these miniature self-hatred spirals tonight. While I was sitting at the bar reading and BSing a bit with D., two very attractive women passed through the place. Both of them were very well put together, organized-looking, obviously intelligent people who obviously had money and education. They were sophisticated types with taste. And in both cases I just thought "well, she's out of my league". I caught the negative wave as it went by, and as much as I still kept beating myself up about it later on I was at least aware from the first step that I had made a cognitive mistake and I was stirring up all the wrong brain responses.
Tiny steps for twitchy brains.