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The American Caliban

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Tasting notes [Dec. 3rd, 2004|12:20 am]
The American Caliban
This evening we took our regular dose of ranitidine (generic for Zantac™), an over-the-counter medicine that reduces stomach acid. As we were preparing to wash it down with a glass of water, we accidentally broke one of the two pills, releasing some of the inside of the pill. This gave us the opportunity to savor and enjoy this flower of the apothecary's art, and we present to you the result.

The initial impression is of sharpness, both physical and chemical. The shards of the pill's shell give a needly intensity to the already piquant burst of flavor from inside. Overall there is a rush of tannins and industrial astringent agents, without the pleasant chiaroscuro of sweet or soft one might hope for. There is, of course, a fruity exploding nose redolent of JP-32 aviation fuel and butterscotch.

Directly following this bitter-bitter cascade, a rush of near-acetone-like aroma occurs, with a pulsating rising nose that strains to the apex of the sinuses. This produced at least in this observer a reflexive slapping of the left palm to the chest, as if suffering from a coronary artery occlusion, and a faint epithet.

After this sharp symphonic blast the finish levels off quickly into a wide palate of pine, wintergreen, and electrical insulation. Hints of bitter almond and antimony can be detected through the essentially caustic bloom on the tongue.

We rate this a 32, on scale where 0 is tap water and 100 is glacially pure hydrofluoric acid. As an example, Flonase dripping down the back of the throat rated a 10, and Yoo-Hoo is a 71.

Until next time, we are your faithful Chevalier de Tasteguhh.

[User Picture]From: scromp
2004-12-03 08:02 am (UTC)

*clap clap clap*

Bravo, sir.
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From: besskeloid
2004-12-03 09:38 am (UTC)
Rotten eggs and kerosene

and other Dr. Seuss classics...
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[User Picture]From: substitute
2004-12-03 09:45 am (UTC)
Ooo, bleck.
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From: besskeloid
2004-12-03 09:53 am (UTC)
Black is the colour of my true love's pants.
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[User Picture]From: frobisher
2004-12-04 12:23 am (UTC)
Huh. I've never found Wellbutrin to have any smell at all. I used to take something that smelled awful, but I can't remember what it was.

And Prednizone tastes awful.
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[User Picture]From: bruisedhips
2004-12-03 10:19 am (UTC)
and so on.

I accidently chewed a motrin once.
It tasted like banana's gone bad.
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[User Picture]From: mr_flippant
2004-12-03 10:59 am (UTC)

Saturday morning

Bananas Gone Bad would be a fun cartoon.
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[User Picture]From: thiscantbesoy
2004-12-03 11:46 am (UTC)
That is great to know.

As an aside, Advil tastes wonderful when you suck on it. No, I'm being serious. It's sweet. I can go to the bathroom and get two pills, put them in my mouth, and then hunt around for my glass of water for two minutes, and no bitter taste. The end.
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