The American Caliban (substitute) wrote,
The American Caliban
substitute

  • Mood:

and then a few gallons of cold swordfish water fell on me

I asked him how the car knew it was upside down and to set it off and he said it had a “thing”. How hard is it to get a fucking Coke with no ice around here? I suppose you have noticed this but she is a girl where it is going to be hard to say if she had a good time or not. I hope they let me wear the pink shoes.

I walk into the room and it’s not his dad at all, it’s a fucking ESCORT. I was the one who decided to call it Spooky Cornbread. I really like the way the trapped people wave their legs in terror. I figured as how if I take the Valium at 6 I’ll be asleep at 10 or if I take it at 8 I’ll be asleep at midnight but in any case I never got to sleep before 1 or 2. Can I ask you personal question that is about the Jewish people?

They ordered a bottle of the cheapest Hennessey and mixed it 1 to 3 with water, no joke. Those guys were wandering around for 20 minutes talking to the pigeons and then they started yelling about a Caesar salad.

We went about smoking crack completely the wrong way. I don’t know what the fuck I’m doing, I haven’t tied a tie since the Navy. Yeah I’m keeping mine clean, I don’t want to be Jessica Lynch and shit.

Then I had the great pleasure of telling those guys their car was uninsurable.
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