The American Caliban (substitute) wrote,
The American Caliban
substitute

ten bucks on number 8, please

Supermarkets often play the kind of whiny sexual loser blather R&B that I just can't stand. oooh baby baby if you could just see that i'm the one for you tonight oh yeah. As I try to figure out the unit pricing on a can of beans. What the fuck. They should just play casiotone music or Devo all the time.

My KONSUMER KWEST for space invaders shoes has sadly come to an end. They were produced in Japan for the 25th anniversary of the game and that's it. They were apparently $100 or something crazy, too.

My libido and desire for feminine companionship is completely gone lately. This is really, really good news.

I'm up to 450 mg of LOLLBUTRIN and back down to 20 mg of SLAXIL. The SLAXIL should go down to 10 mg next month. I hope the fucking sweating goes away.

While listening to some corporate rock radio station in my rental car, I ran into the inane thing where DJs are forced to "work in" the sponsor as a conversational topic in their banter. So the poor jock has to get in some ad copy about the new Dodge Magnum and its 350 hp Hemi engine, or that great article that's only available on AOL for Broadband, etc. Marketers are so neat that way. I was thinking that the next inevitable step is that ordinary citizens will be paid some fee like $20/month to mention products and services in their conversations with others, like the characters in TV commercials. "Well, Louise, I'm sorry to hear that your son didn't get into college. You know, I was using Soft Scrub with Bleach on my sink today and I have to say it left things clean and fresh with just one wipe!" Of course they'd have to spotcheck at least to see that people were carrying out their obligation, so "secret shopper" conversationalists would have to occasionally bust people for not mentioning Fruit Rollups or Term Life Insurance from Mutual of Omaha in conversations.

If I could spend the rest of my life drunk I'd do it, without question.
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