The American Caliban (substitute) wrote,
The American Caliban
substitute

  • Mood:

fan letter sent to portbrewing.com just now

WELP,

I JUST HAD A 22 OUNCE BOTTLE OF YOUR SECOND ANNIVERSARY ALE. IT BLEW UP THE TOP OF MY HEAD AND TOOK MUCH OF THE SKULL CLEAN OFF. I SUPPOSE I WILL REGRET THIS LATER ON BUT IT WAS SO MUCH FUN GETTING THERE THAT I'M STILL HAPPY WITH THE RESULT.

I HAVE NEVER ENJOYED ILLEGAL DRUGS BUT I THINK THERE WAS SOMETHING SIMILAR TO HASHISH IN THERE DUE TO THE INTENSE NEARLY OILY HOP FLAVOR. DEAR GOD THAT WAS GOOD. THE GUY AT HI-TIME WINE KEPT IT IN A LOCKER AND I THINK THAT IS GOOD BECAUSE THIS IS A GENUINELY DANGEROUS LIQUID.

THANK YOU FOR COMPLETELY DESTROYING MY SKULL, MY BRAIN, AND MY HIGHER REASONING IN THE BEST POSSIBLE WAY. I SALUTE YOU FOR SUPERIOR AND DEADLY BREWING.

SALUD,

CONRAD
Tags: beer, food
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