this is the way the world ends, not with a bang but a Hummer
- Welcome to Orange County, where being a summer reading star gets you deadly, lead-tainted toy prizes from the library!
- Welcome to Orange County, where a nice crab roll at Riptide Sushi fills your lungs with ravenous, deadly parasites! Edit: link fixed
- Welcome to Orange County, where even the [correction] guy who looks like a carnie biker to the Register, who fixes cop cars and drinks at Skosh Monahan's thinks that the mayor of Costa Mesa is fucking shit up with his anti-Mexican pogrom.
- Welcome to America, where we push our children through our gigantic supermarkets in remotely managed mind control devices on wheels.
- Welcome to New Orleans, where a night in jail turned into the Raft of the Medusa last year.
- And now, welcome back to Orange County, where the richest, whitest, prettiest kids in the world will try to convert you you a religion they cannot in any meaningful way understand.