The American Caliban (substitute) wrote,
The American Caliban
substitute

Hillary, get a copy editor.

My mother, who is on all liberal mailing lists, received this note from Mrs. Clinton:

Please join Friends of Hillary and help me meet the dual challenges of fighting for our priorities in the Senate while running a strong but forceful campaign that will ensure my re-election by sending a donation of $25, $35, or $50.

AU: Strong and forceful are synonyms and should not be separated by "but".

AU: You set up a parallelism of "dual challenges" and then used "while" to join the clauses, leaving the reader hanging.

AU: The campaign appears to be sending the donation.
Tags: doh, language, politics
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